For someone who used to write religiously, a 3 year creative lag can be a devastating thing. I would get ideas for scenes all the time...during meetings, while driving, at the mall, you name it. And then all of a sudden, the well was DRY. Now of course I could take the easy way out and chalk this time up to the hustle and bustle of everyday life ("adulting" can be hard lol), but I knew it was bigger than that.
Boredom and sheer discontentment with life can be very dangerous territory for an imaginative vessel. It's hard to create characters and scenarios that evoke audience emotion out of thin air if you yourself have become numb to the vibrance that life has to offer. Once I came to terms with the fact that I had spiraled in to a deep depression, it was easier to pick out the right shovel, however small at the time, to slowly dig myself out.
On Tuesday, March 29th, I started to write again! (I consider this to be a miracle)
Slowly but surely, I'm finding my voice. Characters and scenes are manifesting themselves on the page for the first time in a LONG time and I couldn't be more excited! A good friend of mine sent me the above quote around that time, and it couldn't be more accurate. Part of the devastation during this time was the fact that I knew there had to be stories swirling around in my head, but somewhere along the line, I made the choice to not let them breathe. In turn, suffocating those voices...suffocated me.
This is not to say that my life has all of a sudden become worthy of a People magazine or TMZ feature, but I'm more determined than ever to find and savor those magical moments.
And just like that...I'm AWAKE! #grateful